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Lexi Babe, This is a special page for you just to let you know how much we love you
and how much you mean to us. When you were born we couldn't be happier. You
were so beautiful (mama loves to tease you about your being 9lbs. 11oz. and all but
you really were beautiful.) You gave us so much happiness and love we didn't think
you could get any better than you were. Then 6 years of being the only child (the
spoiled princess) you found out you were going to be a big sister. I don't really know
if you were all that excited at first or maybe it had to sink in that it really was true.
You grew on the idea though pretty quick. You found out you were having a baby
brother (that might have helped since you knew you wouldn't have to share your
barbies with a sister) you started planning. You were going to do all kinds of things
with him especially already talking about taking him on your bike to his first day of
school, reading and playing with him.
We loved seeing you getting things ready for your baby brother. We always decide
things as a family and together we decided on your brothers name Wyatt. Wyatt
became the topic of everyones conversation. I didn't want you to feel left out so I
included you in everything and as always even when he was born you were included
in every detail about him. We so wanted to give you a brother or sister someone to
grow up with so you wouldn't be alone. We did give you one princess but now he is
watching over you.
I just want to tell you that everything you have gone through and experienced we are
so proud of you. You were there for your brother from day one. Your life was so
simple and carefree one minute and the next your life was never the same. You grew
up so fast more than any six year old should have to. You stayed with your brother
every minute you could in the hospital. You read to him, sang to him and talked to
him. You looked past all his machines and just loved him for who he was. Wyatt
couldn't be any luckier to have a sister like you.
Lexi, we know how hard it was but you never complained. You went to school in El
Centro while papa and mama were in San Diego for the first couple of months Wyatt
was in the hospital. When we finally got to bring him home how happy you were. You
were so good always washing your hands before touching him, loving him and doing
everything for him. Then when we had to go back and said he had to stay you said
you had to be with us and so you were. You went to school at Children's and the
only real interaction with kids were from the nurses and respiratory therapist kids.
They cared for you as much as they did for Wyatt. They would take you to their
homes and have you play with their kids, bring you books to read and help with
keeping you up to date on your school work. They would walk you to class and pick
you up and take you to lunch. Not only did you bring happiness to us but to everyone
in the neonatal intensive care unit when you walked through those doors.
Baby doll you spent your birthday in the waiting room, Christmas in a hotel room,
New Years at the hospital and Thanksgiving away from home but you once again
never complained. You saw so many babies pass away the reactions from their
parents but that never kept you from seeing your brother. You would read to all the
babies and go talk to them and when we saw that we couldn't be prouder of you.
When we had to tell you that we were going to take your brother off the machines
and let him be at peace to see the look on your face we will never forget. You were
there when we took him off and when he took his last breath and I know it is one of
the hardest things you had to do. The next day was Easter and we know how you
wanted to spend it with your brother and the pain you felt not having him there we
will never know. We did have your basket for you but we all know you just wanted
your brother to be there.
Sometimes mama feels guilty that I gave you a brother only for him to be taken away
from you. The Dr's say it is a fluke what Wyatt had but mama is the one that carried
him for nine months and mama is diabetic and sometimes it is just so hard on me to
know that all you wanted was your brother and we so wanted that for you. Then I
see you remembering him and talking about him and I know you will always have him
with you through your life for just like me and daddy we will honor him by keeping his
memory alive and in our hearts.
Alexis you have grown up into one of the most beautiful, loving, caring person and we
are so proud to call you our daughter. You will never "get over" losing your brother or
never not grieve for him sweetie we all know that. We have just came back from El
Centro to get together for Wyatt's 8th anniversary of his passing away and when I
was out there talking to him I could see the years that have gone by and how much
you have grown. When he passed away you were so quiet and shy but who could
blame you after everything you went through. You comforted us by just coming up
and giving us hugs and we talked and talked. We told you it was o.k. to cry and to
talk about him and tell us how you feel. Sometimes I wonder if you kept some things
inside because you didn't want to cause us pain. Like a few years ago when out of
the blue you told me that you didn't have dinner the night Wyatt passed away and
just at the end of last year you asked me "haven't you noticed that I don't wear black
a lot?"I never did and it finally hit me that you didn't wear it. My way of grieving for
Wyatt was to wear black for a year and you said you saw me in black every day that
you just didn't want to wear it and didn't really like the color. The things we are still
learning about our grieving it will never end.
We know it is very hard for you to open up about your feelings to other people and
especially about things that are dear to your heart that is something you will do on
your own time. We do see you opening up a bit and we are proud of you for that.
We know baby that you are scared to let people in (that aren't your family) for you
are afraid of getting close and something happening but you are trying and we know
you are on your way of conquering your fear.
What this letter comes down to is you mean everything to not only your papa and
mama but to Wyatt also. You are what keeps us going in our lives. You bring so
much joy to us. You taught us to laugh again and enjoy each other. You and your
brother are the best things to happen to us. We just want to Thank You for being you
and giving us the honor of being your papa and mama and for giving Wyatt the honor
of having you as his sister he couldn't be any luckier. We all love you our Princess
and we never take one day for granted of having you in our lives. Love, Papa, Mama
and your baby brother Wyatt.
and how much you mean to us. When you were born we couldn't be happier. You
were so beautiful (mama loves to tease you about your being 9lbs. 11oz. and all but
you really were beautiful.) You gave us so much happiness and love we didn't think
you could get any better than you were. Then 6 years of being the only child (the
spoiled princess) you found out you were going to be a big sister. I don't really know
if you were all that excited at first or maybe it had to sink in that it really was true.
You grew on the idea though pretty quick. You found out you were having a baby
brother (that might have helped since you knew you wouldn't have to share your
barbies with a sister) you started planning. You were going to do all kinds of things
with him especially already talking about taking him on your bike to his first day of
school, reading and playing with him.
We loved seeing you getting things ready for your baby brother. We always decide
things as a family and together we decided on your brothers name Wyatt. Wyatt
became the topic of everyones conversation. I didn't want you to feel left out so I
included you in everything and as always even when he was born you were included
in every detail about him. We so wanted to give you a brother or sister someone to
grow up with so you wouldn't be alone. We did give you one princess but now he is
watching over you.
I just want to tell you that everything you have gone through and experienced we are
so proud of you. You were there for your brother from day one. Your life was so
simple and carefree one minute and the next your life was never the same. You grew
up so fast more than any six year old should have to. You stayed with your brother
every minute you could in the hospital. You read to him, sang to him and talked to
him. You looked past all his machines and just loved him for who he was. Wyatt
couldn't be any luckier to have a sister like you.
Lexi, we know how hard it was but you never complained. You went to school in El
Centro while papa and mama were in San Diego for the first couple of months Wyatt
was in the hospital. When we finally got to bring him home how happy you were. You
were so good always washing your hands before touching him, loving him and doing
everything for him. Then when we had to go back and said he had to stay you said
you had to be with us and so you were. You went to school at Children's and the
only real interaction with kids were from the nurses and respiratory therapist kids.
They cared for you as much as they did for Wyatt. They would take you to their
homes and have you play with their kids, bring you books to read and help with
keeping you up to date on your school work. They would walk you to class and pick
you up and take you to lunch. Not only did you bring happiness to us but to everyone
in the neonatal intensive care unit when you walked through those doors.
Baby doll you spent your birthday in the waiting room, Christmas in a hotel room,
New Years at the hospital and Thanksgiving away from home but you once again
never complained. You saw so many babies pass away the reactions from their
parents but that never kept you from seeing your brother. You would read to all the
babies and go talk to them and when we saw that we couldn't be prouder of you.
When we had to tell you that we were going to take your brother off the machines
and let him be at peace to see the look on your face we will never forget. You were
there when we took him off and when he took his last breath and I know it is one of
the hardest things you had to do. The next day was Easter and we know how you
wanted to spend it with your brother and the pain you felt not having him there we
will never know. We did have your basket for you but we all know you just wanted
your brother to be there.
Sometimes mama feels guilty that I gave you a brother only for him to be taken away
from you. The Dr's say it is a fluke what Wyatt had but mama is the one that carried
him for nine months and mama is diabetic and sometimes it is just so hard on me to
know that all you wanted was your brother and we so wanted that for you. Then I
see you remembering him and talking about him and I know you will always have him
with you through your life for just like me and daddy we will honor him by keeping his
memory alive and in our hearts.
Alexis you have grown up into one of the most beautiful, loving, caring person and we
are so proud to call you our daughter. You will never "get over" losing your brother or
never not grieve for him sweetie we all know that. We have just came back from El
Centro to get together for Wyatt's 8th anniversary of his passing away and when I
was out there talking to him I could see the years that have gone by and how much
you have grown. When he passed away you were so quiet and shy but who could
blame you after everything you went through. You comforted us by just coming up
and giving us hugs and we talked and talked. We told you it was o.k. to cry and to
talk about him and tell us how you feel. Sometimes I wonder if you kept some things
inside because you didn't want to cause us pain. Like a few years ago when out of
the blue you told me that you didn't have dinner the night Wyatt passed away and
just at the end of last year you asked me "haven't you noticed that I don't wear black
a lot?"I never did and it finally hit me that you didn't wear it. My way of grieving for
Wyatt was to wear black for a year and you said you saw me in black every day that
you just didn't want to wear it and didn't really like the color. The things we are still
learning about our grieving it will never end.
We know it is very hard for you to open up about your feelings to other people and
especially about things that are dear to your heart that is something you will do on
your own time. We do see you opening up a bit and we are proud of you for that.
We know baby that you are scared to let people in (that aren't your family) for you
are afraid of getting close and something happening but you are trying and we know
you are on your way of conquering your fear.
What this letter comes down to is you mean everything to not only your papa and
mama but to Wyatt also. You are what keeps us going in our lives. You bring so
much joy to us. You taught us to laugh again and enjoy each other. You and your
brother are the best things to happen to us. We just want to Thank You for being you
and giving us the honor of being your papa and mama and for giving Wyatt the honor
of having you as his sister he couldn't be any luckier. We all love you our Princess
and we never take one day for granted of having you in our lives. Love, Papa, Mama
and your baby brother Wyatt.
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